Dating can have it's ups and downs in the best of times but when you are dating newly divorced men, it can be even more challenging.
Most people, men and women, will want to move on from their pain as soon as possible so they will often want to date, sometimes before they are really emotionally ready to do so.
The point is that they may truly believe that they are ready to move on, but in reality they may not have totally dealt with their pain and grief. It's not that they are lying to you, it may just be that they are in denial and anxious to move on and be happy again.
So, how can you tell? Well, sometimes there are signs but other times there may not be, or they may be so obscure that you can't really recognize them.
Here are a few things that you should keep in mind when dating a guy who has just been divorced:
1. First of all, I would highly recommend that you take things very slowly. As I stated above, many guys may truly believe that they are over their ex and ready to move on, but they are in denial.
So, you should be very cautious about how quickly you move on an emotional level. If you find that you are very attracted to him early on, you may have to pull back a little bit and slow things down.
This may be difficult to do but it might also keep you from getting hurt.
2. You need to also be aware that your new guy will most likely continue to have contact with his ex if they have kids. As long as the kids are still young, your guy will need to talk with his ex about the care of the kids.
If you are the overly jealous type, this may not be the best type of situation for you.
In addition to the jealousy issue, there is also the issue of time. If you date a guy who has kids, he will have a lot of other responsibilities. Are you going to be ok sharing him with his kids?
3. Also, do you even like kids? If you don't than it's unlikely your relationship will ever go anywhere. Are you comfortable dating him knowing that you will probably never marry?
Be honest with yourself before you get too deeply involved. If you aren't you will only cause yourself and the new guy in your life more pain.
4. And last, but not least, if you are ready to settle down, a newly divorced guy may not be the best dating option for you. Most divorced people won't want to rush right into a new relationship.
Even if they do want to, they probably shouldn't. They need to take the time, and it could be years, to fully get to the point where they are truly ready to move on.
Are you going to be willing to wait? Are you sure?
Dating newly divorced men can have it's challenges to be sure. But at least you know that the guy isn't a commitment phobe, as long as you are willing to be patient and allow him the time he needs to be ready to really commit to you, he may be a great choice for you.